Claremont Cops Bust Up Kinder "Rave"

A Kindergarten End of Year party turned "Rave" was shut down by police late Wednesday morning at a local park after neighbors complained about the noise. 85 kindergarten students were at Cahuilla Park celebrating the end of the school year, an annual tradition at Condit, when things got out of hand. "It's too damn loud," said Abe Simpson, a park neighbor who just realized he lived next door to park. "I can't believe they hired Van Halen for their party. It's just too damn loud. And get off my lawn!" "Have you seen those kids? They're hopped up on Fruit Snacks and Juice Boxes!" stated Melvin Udall. "I can't hear "Matlock" over that racket!" Officer Krupke, who responded to the melee, found 2 adult chaperones, Michelle Godt and Pam Batista dishing out "Fudge Bars" and "Ice Cream Sandwiches" to the Condit Ravers. "This is a slippery slope. It starts with Fudge Bars and Ice Cream Sandwiches. Next time it will be Flaming Hot Cheetos and Dr. Pepper, then where does it end? We need to put a stop to this now." Charges have not been formally files for the 2 adults, but each student is facing a 60 day suspension.